School Pictures...Or, Not.

I hate school pictures. I do.

You pick an outfit that will show up well in the pictures.

You wash your cherub, making sure to scrub behind their ears and between their toes.

You comb your munchkin's hair just so. You plaster it in place with water, gel, and hairspray. Or if you are my sister, you don't.

Then you send your precious angel skipping into school.

Where they do a project with glue and glitter.

And go out to morning recess.

Just before lunch it starts to rain.

Lunch that day happens to be corn dogs.

Since your child is a lot like you, they eat their corn dogs with mustard.

And wipe their mouth with their sleeve. Fabulous.

By recess time the rain has stopped.

And one of the older kids has organised a "touch" football game and has graciously allowed your cutie bug to play- for the other team.

Hot, sweaty, mustardy, muddy, and slightly sparkly, your child lines up after recess and their class goes directly to pictures.

Where your child hands over the $45 for package "F" which you chose because it was the least expensive package that has both an 8x10 and a class picture.

And this is what you get back 4 to 6 weeks later:

Which is why I won't buy them. Instead, I make an appointment at my local portrait studio for a weekend day when my husband will be home. I leave 4 children with him and take the child to be photographed. We do pictures to roughly coincide with their birthdays, so there's no huge rush in September.

You pick an outfit that will show up well in the pictures.
You wash your cherub, making sure to scrub behind their ears and between their toes.
You comb your munchkin's hair just so. You plaster it in place with water, gel, and hairspray.

You get into the car and drive to the studio.

You work with the photographer for 30 minutes.

You pay $25.

You have enough pictures for your humongous family.

They will be back in 2 weeks.

And this is what you get:

And then, as a special treat for sitting and cooperating so well, you let your child make a truly hideous face and have it printed up in wallet size to pass out to all of their friends at school.

Actually, I'm not positive that she doesn't belong to Lizzy, as this is a talent that I absolutely do not possess.